It may seem that I have abandoned you people but fear not, I haven’t. I am at University and it is just fab!
But now I am waiting for Lost to buffer, so I shall tell you all about the magic of Brizzle.
I live by a river, and there are many swans and tramps. I like to feed the swans if I can, as there is a doughnut van on the bank and I fear they must get really hungry with that lovely smell all the time. I don’t feed the tramps, but I gave one 20p once. I live on the 3rd floor above a Costcutters, which is very useful for obtaining Yorkies at short notice. I have also managed to talk my way into some kind of deal with the foreign shopkeeper, and so I get a special deal on wine. It’s called ‘Sandy Cove’ and it’s from England, which is never a good sign, and it tastes like watered-down squash. It is depressing when one can’t afford ‘Three Mills’.
Because we live so high up, and our buzzer button doesn’t work, we have devised a fruity system for letting people in. One stands at the window with some wastage, for example a pomegranate or a wrinkly apple. Then, one takes the keycard and stabs it into the apple, so that it is wedged in. Then you simply drop it out of the window! It works wonders, and it is an excellent way to get rid of old food, although there is always lots of pomegranates or apples or potatoes or cheese outside, so watch where you tread.
This morning I applied for a job as one of Santa’s Helpers in Bristol Mall. I won’t lie, this might be considered one of my low-points in life so far. There I was, serving the highest quality food at lovely Waitrose, and just 2 months on I might be having to talk to tiny children about which Hannah Montana toy they would like. What happened to Tamagotchis and RSPCA Animal Vans??
I joined Volleyball yesterday! It’s amazing!!! I can’t reach my arms up into the air today, but it was worth it!! There’s lots of shots and things that I didn’t realise about, because at school we just played it where you hit the ball, and it would go all over the Sports Hall and end up in the basketball hoop. But we were doing proper tactics and everything, and it was fun times.
In conclusion: Brizzle is the shizzle.